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选择

一生中总有那么一些时刻，我们需要鼓起勇气去作选择。而这些选择不仅不符常理，违背理性，甚至离经叛道得罪亲友。即便如此，我们可能还会一意孤行！因为我们相信自己的决定，我们做了最该做的事。 --马云


选择，是幸福的开始。 --《幸福59厘米》

越是重要的选择，越要自己做决定，容不得别人掺和。

人的一生是由一串选择组成。

爱有多久

幸福59厘米之爱有多久

Quora

知道Quora已有很长时间，只是没有经常用到。自从到了西海岸以后，不知什么原因，慢慢的喜欢上了这个网站，或者说一种新的互动协议。
国内也有类似的问答类网站，比如百度知道，天涯问答，雅虎知识堂等等。但是他们和Quora有质的差别，根本原因我认为在于两种不同的文化环境。美国人对于问题与回答的热情远远超过中国人，这也是基于美国的独特的教育系统甚至政治体制。所以美国人能够设计出如此完善的问答社区也理所应当了。

昨天看到Life Advice的两个问题，问题问得好，回答写的棒。

Q1. What could a 20-year-old do to potentially improve their quality of life further down the line?

Answer points:

At 20, there are two things you're trying to critically balance, the short-term versus the long-term:
The decisions you make at this stage will impact the rest of your life. This is easy to vastly underestimate: don't. Consider the long-term impact of your serious decisions.
You have unique opportunities and freedoms in the short-term that will grow more distant with time/age.Your responsibilities to external factors increase to the point that you can't be as spontaneous and wild, so use this as a chance to have these experiences.

Time is your most precious resource, and yours is fleeting. Money is no substitute for youth. Money can be earned, given, or stored; not time.

Envision your older self looking back, thinking "I'm so glad I ____" or "I wish I had done ____" or "I wish I hadn't _____." Always try to fill in the blank for the second term and seek it out!

• The concept of diminishing time + short term vs long term leads to some big take-aways:
• Take big risks (you're young and can afford to do so, due to relatively few commitments, etc)
• Travel as much as possible (don't wait till you're retired, you may never live that long)
• Always re-invest in yourself: learn, develop new skills, keep getting educated
• Don't be ashamed to seek professional help when life's got you down.
• Your 20s are the absolute best time to do that thing you've always dreamed of. Travel the world, act, sing, design a video game, make art, write, compose, paint, start a business, whatever: just do it! If you don't do it now, you may never fulfill that dream.

All that being said, these are the main components of vital 20-something knowledge:

• Habits
• Socialization
• Dreams and Goals
• Money
• Mind

Let's drill into these!


At this early stage, developing good habits (and avoiding or stopping bad ones) is a huge part of overall life success and happiness.

• Make exercise and proper nutrition a key part of your daily/weekly life
• Learn to cook (since you eat every day your entire life)
• Floss as often as possible
• Drink lots of water
• Take vitamins or minerals (if deemed healthy)
• Manage sun exposure properly (a little bit is necessary, a lot is carcinogenic).
• If you smoke, quit. (Do this ASAP, it's really hard to quit later.)
• Don't drink yourself to sleep every night.
• Practice safe sex (use protection).
• Finish things you start.
• Keep in mind: Build good habits early in your life so it's easy to maintain later.

Master your social dimension (dating / relationships / friendships):

• Understand your emotions and learn to like yourself (but not to a fault)
• Laugh often.
• Date often: understand what you want AND what a potential life mate should ideally be to deal with you
• Don't be afraid of marriage or long-term relationships: people have been in these for millennia for a reason.
• Alway try to be friendly and optimistic (smile!)
• Always try to help others. (Volunteering is a great human endeavor.)
• Don't burn down bridges (grudges achieve very little)
• Edit your friends: avoid people "going the wrong way" with drugs, excessive drinking, odd cults, extreme politics, laziness, irresponsibility, negativity and lack of motivation/ambition. You don't want these people around. Also: seek out useful, active, interesting people and build those relationships instead.
• Break through "age apartheid:" Be friends with those older than you (optimally some 5 years older and some 10 years older) so you have proper mentors.
• Hustle is better than passivity (but not to an extreme, don't violate the "friendly principles" listed above.
• Don't make friends purely for self-gain, but always keep in mind who can be a good partner for any future venture.
• Learn a second or third language to make more friends (around the world)! See 'expanding mental skill sets' subsection below.

Be able to fulfill your dreams:

    PART 1: Lay out your dreams and goals (optimism)

• Don't live your life for anyone else. Do what YOU want to do, not parents or significant others.
• Be true to YOUR individual goals and dreams.
• Be open-minded about your goals and dreams. They will evolve over time.
• Periods of uncertainty and/or setbacks are guaranteed. Accept them and learn from them!

    PART 2: Work toward your dreams and goals (realism)

• Get credentialed: university degrees, vocations, trade skills and crafts, certifications, licenses, etc. No harm in racking these up. Minimal chance of regret
• Get experienced: teach or tutor, even for a little bit. Travel counts too!
• Get smart: try and get credentialed/recognized for hobbies or any other way you spend your time.
• Go for advanced degrees only in subjects you're passionate about.
• Be patient: great stories, companies, research, structures, etc take years to build.

    Master money, finances and investing:

• Start learning how to make money work for you (not the other way around) early.
• Get a core understanding of personal finance (you don't need to be a pro, just the 101 intro course-worth)
• Stay out of debt.
• Start saving NOW.
• Live within your means.
• Money is not the most important thing in the world, but financial security will give you a choice, and choice is important.

    Maximize your mind (expand mental skill-sets):

• Learn to think using multiple mental models: math, physics, biology, psychology, etc... and work up to the point where they're deployed automatically. To do this, see the next bullet point.
• Read as much as you can possible withstand (this will help with the above).
• Write as often as you can. It helps organize your thoughts and makes you a better communicator (on paper at least).
• Master attention and focus: these are lifelong tools that will lead to greater self-improvement.
• Learn to be disciplined and work with deadlines (yes, your 20s are a time to be free and spontaneous, but remember to balance short vs long term).
• Learn at least two languages (besides your native language). Learn one language for business. Learn another to expand your social life.
• Make sure you know how to touch-type.
• Learn to use library research and web search tools to your advantage.

Q2. What would you advise your (hypothetical) 22-year old college-grad child to do with their life?

Answer points:

• Time is your most precious resource. Money can be borrowed, given, and stored. None of these things can be done with time. Always seek to trade money for time.
• Your 20s are uniquely productive in that you're a legal adult, educated, have high levels of energy and physical health, and likely few commitments. Use this time wisely!
• Build quality relationships with people.
• Try and avoid working for a big organization. They're filled with mediocre people who are frustrating and boring. But if you do end up choosing to work for a large organization, find ways to make yourself happy there. And if you're not, go for something else!
• Don't take things so seriously.
• Always operate from a learning perspective. Share your knowledge with others, analyze how others got to know things and how they approach the world.
• Try and find a life where you get to use your creative talents.
• Follow growth companies and industries. You will learn exponentially more.
• PhDs are for future professors only.
• Don't make compromises about where you live.
• Make your commute as short as possible.
• Try and be a little wiser than when you wake up each day.
• Work only with people you enjoy.
• Learn to accept setbacks.
• Learn to see the best in people.
• Forgive often.
• Always take action; inaction is regretted much more than action.
• Give to others and volunteer.